It's a good thing that when I let my mind wander and find myself in the past reliving events like an impotent NPC while I watch my younger self in the passenger seat, I want to scream. It’s good because I’ve grown and evolved from that insecure yet somehow simultaneously self absorbed mephit. If I haven’t I’d be perfectly okay remembering when I kept engaging with a guy who was so clearly not interested in me so many more times than he deserved and not seething at the stupidity while my incredible husband brings me a bagel in bed after a long day. However growth doesn't earase the memories and associated shame of being that idiot mephit. Tragic, I know.
As a result I’ve found my 30’s to be a largely contradictory duet of wishing I'd never done that and wishing I'd just fucking done that.
See the thing is, so far things have kind of just worked out. Maybe it's plot armor. Anyways it's great because things have largely fallen into place, but it's tragic because I’m woefully underprepared and too anxious to fully enjoy my good fortune.
Cliche as it may be, I never quite expected to see 30. I was convinced my time was limited and I was best served living hard and fast in an effort to shine my brightest before the star of my fiery ultimately insignificant life fizzled out with a wholly underwhelming poof.
Ha ha ha.
Oh idiot mephit.
See in theory it doesn't sound like there's anything wrong with living life to the fullest, and there isn't but that's not what I was doing. I was trying to jam an entire lifetime into my early twenties and, well. Mistakes were made.
So, if you're here because you genuinely want to raise praying manti, I have two things to tell you.
One, why would you trust this book? The plural for praying mantises is, well, praying mantises. This book is not that guide. Rather this book is a guide to not take yourself so seriously, maybe.
Before you go though, I do have one tip. If you’re afraid of bugs and your fourth grade teacher gives you the opportunity to take home a baby praying mantis or two along with all the other kids, just say no. The deaths of those bugs will haunt you for the rest of your life. You stupid fucking mephit. You did your best though and we love you for that.
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